Dear Feyma: “Question on expats who home-school”

August 22, 2013 by feyma

Dear Feyma: “Question on expats who home-school”

I got an email from our reader here, his name is James. He is asking about any expats who home-school their kids. I was asked same inquiries before. Instead of answering him with I don’t know I want to ask here first instead. I was thinking not just James has the same some questions about home-schooling. I his is email below:

“Hello I have been following your web blog for years and I have a question? Do you know of any expats there in PI that homeschool their kids? Reason being I am looking at bringing my 9 year old son Sam with me to PI this fall.

The reason I am asking about Homeschool is I homeschool him here in the US but I want to look to bringing him to stay with me if his Mom will let me bring him to PI for a vacation for a month or two. I would like an idea on how homeschool there in PI that Expats do. I want to immerse him into starting him on a journey of living overseas from time to time.

Thanks and have a good day”

I am recalling who do I know that home-schools their kids here. So far the people that I know that home-school already left the Philippines. I don’t have any way of contacting them again. So when James asked me about it I immediately told him that I might make an article out from his query. Which I did now. I’m pretty sure someone from our readers experience home-schooling here in the Philippines. At least they could share here the experiences they have on home-schooling in the Philippines. They could share also the place where to get the books, pamphlets and other materials needed for it. They might also know the circle/group of parents that the kids were on the same grades levels that they can have play time/activities for their kids. Not sure if only in Manila where to get the materials. As everything here in the Philippines almost all will be coming from Manila. Hopefully availability of materials can be found on other cities in the Philippines.

Home Schooling

Maybe also go to the Department of Education, ask them if they know of a place or people that home-school kids. If they have communities that they know of that registered to the department. Do they have materials/books that specially for for home-school kids and that accredited to the department of education. I think, the department of education people have all the knowledge that we are having in our minds right now.

Maybe one other place to go and ask will be the tutorial place. So many tutorial places near the schools. I had a feeling that one of them might have the knowledge about home-schooling or they might know of somebody that home schools their kids.

I’ve heard of many actors and actresses here that were home-schooled. And hearing from them on TV they had places to go to get their materials for the semester or school year. They just didn’t indulge where to go though. With them they might have tutors that get for them.

If any of you knows or already home-schooling kids please feel free to share your experiences of home schooling kids here. I really appreciate your help for James and other people that have same question with him.

Cheers!

August 15, 2013 by feyma

Our mischievous pets in the house!

You probably saw on Bob’s Facebook photos of our newly made Turtleville. It was really a fun project for the whole family. It all started a few days before our Anniversary. My brother-in-law Jhun came here for a job that we wanted him to do for one of our businesses. It took him 2 days for that job. I told him after his work for the business, I had projects for him to do. For one, I would like for him to build a bigger place for our turtles, so that they could roam around instead of just in that small plastic tub that were in.

So Jhun started the project that I wanted him to do. He bought the cement and pebbles and other stuff. So while Jhun was finishing up with the “turtle swimming pool” Bob asked Jhun if he could make the pool have an opening with a ramp to go down, that the turtle could go in and out easily. Bob wanted the turtles to go down and have room to roam around. So we decided to use some big rocks, like bolders, that we had in our yard for the fence. They really are huge rocks and very heavy too. So we settled for that. While the new pool was drying, Jhun started moving the big rocks with our help. Later that afternoon the pool was safe for the turtles to go in, so we put them inside. Soon enough Chuckie (the big turtle) figured out right away how to get down the ramp. We were so confident they would not get out of our rock fence that we built (arranged really) for them. Shocking to say but it just took Chuckie less than 30 minutes to figure it out how to get out of the rocks. Gosh he’s so tricky. Few times he fell on his back but he knows how to flip over to his tummy again.

That’s when Bob decided we will make a bamboo fence for them. Chuckie was on a hunt to look for a place to escape the new bamboo fence. He is so restless. We we’re so confident that we built the nice bamboo fence, (duh), but the next morning, I was just sitting on our porch talking to my sister on the phone. I saw Chuckie almost got out of the fence. He climbed next to the tub with his other legs on the bamboo fence and just keep moving up and his head was already on the other side of the fence. In shock I was screaming to Jhun that Chuckie’s almost out. That problem was fixed for now. He is trying to climb at the roots of the tree, but he didn’t make it yet. Thank God for that.

Today I saw our cat Sputnik climbed inside the turtle kingdom. She’s the other mischievous pet in the house. I was just observing her. I thought she might hurt the turtle but I guess she was just watching the turtles for now. Not sure if she will do something if we are not watching. I’m not sure what would Chuckie learn from Sputnik in the long run. Sputnik really knows how to get our attention. She knows how to show other cats what to do. Whenever she’s sleeping in one of the kids’ bedroom, come morning like after 5 am and no one was up, she will meow near the door, if no one will get up and opened the door for her she will bite somebody’s toes if out in the blanket. If no one still listening to her meow she will then go near the ear of the person and meow louder. If no one still listening she will push important stuffs on top of the side table especially cell phone. That will get the kids’ attention then. She also knows how to wake Bob and I. If it is past wake up time and no one gives them food, she will knock/pound our door to make sure we know that she’s out there calling. Problem is, she knows I am usually up early and feed them. So if I’m late she will be outside our door knocking and meowing.

Every morning now Bob and I sit near the turtle kingdom and just watch our Chuckie and Sputnik. It’s kind of our stress reliever. We are now thinking of putting some new projects soon.

August 8, 2013 by feyma

Through the years, 23 years to be exact!

This first part is from Feyma.

Wow, 23 years ago on the 9th of August Bob and I said our “I DO’s”. Another year to create precious memories together. I just can’t believe it that it has been that long ago already since we became husband and wife. We were both in our 20′s then. Him in his late 20′s and me being in my early 20′s.

Can’t believe it that we’ve been together for over 2 decades now. It’s been a good ride for us. We are blessed with our 3 good looking boys, and 2 beautiful daughters (have to brag. LOL).

It’s been a roller coaster ride for us. We totally handled it good with the grace of God the almighty.

Of course we had our moments, just like the typical and normal couple. Our marriage is far from perfect, especially with the two different cultures together. Bob would say something and I take it differently. Sometimes we argue and fight, thank God not physically. Raising voices yes we do that, who would not. Being married for 23 years and together almost everyday (24/7 for a lot of years, since Bob has been working at home for more than 20 years) what can you expect? LOL. I’m so glad Bob put up with some of my shenanigans. I think he’s the only guy that can put up with it. Ha ha ha… Really he’s an amazing husband and a father to our kids. He is really good to our girls too. He’s also good to my family especially when my parents were alive. He was so thoughtful to them. That’s why I love him more for that. I know he will do anything for me. I do the same for him.

Bob works hard to support me, our kids and some members of my family. He never complained that. We’ve been burned out on helping other members of the family especially nieces that have been so ungrateful. One thing that’s so different on the 2 cultures. Filipino way, after what happened to some of my family members so disrespectful and not appreciating what we’ve done for them. I told Bob I had it, we are not sending anybody to school anymore. Western way: they would still support the other family members because not all members of the family are the same. In short not judgmental. I really applauded him for that. He totally open my eyes. I think I was just blindsided by my anger and embarrassment. I got over it and moved on.

To Bob: I love you so much honey. You and the kids really are my life. Thank you so much for loving me unconditionally. Thank you for helping me adjusting and teaching me living the life in the States. Thank you for pampering me. You really taught me a lot in life. Love you more for that. Happy 23rd Anniversary Babe. Another year to strengthen our marriage that last a lifetime!!!

A few photos from our years together

Now, this part is from Bob.

Thank you, hon, for your kind words! You know that I love you very much! Unlike most couples, this is the first (and only) marriage for each of us, and we will keep it that way, I know that!

We have had a lot of good times together, and a few bad too, of course. I have so many great memories of my times over the past 23 years! I know you do too. When we first got married, and you migrated to the States, I was able to help teach you and help you learn the ropes of how things worked there. After a few years of that, we both learned from each other (well, I guess we did that all along too, though). Then, in 2000, we moved to the Philippines and it was your turn to start teaching me how things work here. I love you for that.

Something that a lot of our readers may not know is about cooking. When we got married and you moved to the States, I quickly learned that you didn’t know how to cook! It was not a problem for me, though, because I enjoyed cooking, and I welcomed the opportunity to make meals for you. I hope you liked the things that I cooked. I quickly bought some Filipino cookbooks and I started cooking Filipino food for you. It wasn’t always perfect, but a lot of times it turned out great. I took great pride in the fact that I always made sure that you had some kind of food from “back home” to keep you feeling comfortable in the States. You never did learn to cook very much in the States. However, when we moved to the Philippines, you decided it was your turn to take care of me when it came to the cooking department. You not only started cooking most of the meals, you also learned how to cook American food, and you always made sure that I had the kinds of foods that made me happy! I love you a lot for that!

Marrying you was the best thing I ever did, and the thing that made me happiest in life. A close second was when we grew a family. We had 3 boys in the States, and they are all good kids, and I know that both of us are very proud of our boys. Still, as much as I love our boys, and you too, we always wanted to have a girl as well. Moving here gave us the opportunity to make that addition to our family by taking in two of our nieces and making them our daughters. It has really made my family life complete, and I love the girls just as much as I do our boys.

Happy Anniversary, honey, I love you from the bottom of my heart! Thanks for writing this surprise post, and I think you will also be surprised when you see that I added the second half to it!

August 1, 2013 by feyma

Another unending cycle of problems here in the Philippines!

I was just browsing my wall on Facebook. One message caught my eyes. Just reading the story brought some thoughts in me. The never ending cycle of family problems that goes on here in the Philippines. It’s a story and revelation of a family problem with the property that was left behind by the parents. The person that wrote this, it was her grand dad who was a victim. The story goes that the grand father had 6 hectares. He was happy to have that, he used the income for his needs every month. Finally he didn’t realize that one of his daughters pawned the land to somebody else. That daughter didn’t give any share to her other siblings. Well, she didn’t even ask her dad for that. Take note the dad is still alive.

Well, one day her uncle and aunt approached her if she could get the pawned land from other people since she’s earning pretty good money. She did agree to what they asked. She went and got the land and she did let the grandfather and her aunt and uncle signed the papers that she owned the land now since she paid from the person the aunt loaned it to. Even she owned the land, all income still goes to her grandfather. She was happy to give it to him when he was alive since he had no other income aside from that land. It continue on for years.

Farm land to earn for the family

When the grandfather died, she then wants to get the land so that she could give to her parents. So she asked for the title and other papers. She found out that the aunt that pawned had the title and other papers. So she realized too that the papers that she had with her it’s not notarized by the lawyer (the agreement between her and her grandfather). Not be honored then.

Just by reading with the story of the lady it also reminds me of a message I got over a year ago. The same problem as these lady. The lady was asking for an advice from me on what should she do and her other siblings against other siblings who was getting all the income from the property that their parents left for them. She was really in deeply need on what to do. I just told her to go see a lawyer in there area that specialize about property.

Honestly it happened to my family too. We had nephews that took over some of my parents’ property. One of my nephews used the family of his wife to get the property from us since they are the natives in the area. Problem for them my parents bought the property legally from one of the local residents there before I was even born and the wife of the owner she’s a native in the area and knew my parents very well. Her and her kids helped out my sisters now on getting back our land from my nephew. We even had papers to prove to them that my parents owned the land. My parents hired people there to plant coconut trees and other fruit trees there. I think in mid to late 60′s. When we had it surveyed a few years ago, we hired a few army men to escort the surveyor and my siblings to be there. When the army saw the land the army men and other people that accompanied my siblings made a comment, that no wonder that my nephew would not give it up because it’s a good piece of land that my parents have there. Yeah my nephew should be very happy the area alone the size I think were little over 18 hectares.

We hired a lawyer to take care of a lot of our paperwork now. I think lately my nephew realized that we would never give up to him the property of our parents. So now we are just waiting for the courts decision. It will be a big loss for him. He usually gets more or less 200 sacks of corn, plus the income from the copra and other plants there.

To be honest I told my parents before they passed, during of one of my visits here before to sell all the land they owned and enjoy life. I told them go take vacations to Bohol to visit all the relatives there or go to Cebu visit mom’s family. My dad just had something in mind, he wanted to leave us something and hand it down to the next generation. Wished he did that. Now all of us siblings agreed to sell everything, just leave the land where we grew up with.

I know lots of similar problem going on all over here in the Philippines and even on other country. Families fighting over inheritance. Some were even killing each other. I know for one my cousins were using fists fights for it. I know it sounds crazy but it’s happening though.

July 25, 2013 by feyma

Can we all get along!

I was talking to an old friend. We were trying to reminisce our good memories of our lives when we used to live in the States. We’ve known each other during our time of getting the visa days in Manila. We’ve met there at the US Embassy office over 22 years ago now. We really became good friends ever since then. Reminiscing the waiting at the early hours for the US Embassy office to finally open, wanting to be the first in line. Ha ha ha.. No matter how early me and my sister went there we usually be on the 5th or so in line. But oh well, still happy to be one of the first few people that will enter the place.

What a chaotic place that was when it opened. We had a joke before that when entering the embassy, it felt like entering the public market here in the Philippines. Too noisy. Lol. I’m pretty sure they might be controlled better now, since some of the other transactions were done online. One sample alone was the getting of the visa. During our time we had to go back to the embassy a few days after the interview and get the visa ourselves. Nowadays, they will just mail it to you directly to the address you’ve provided for them to be sent to. More convenient and no hassles of waiting outside the gate and inside the office.

My friend was telling me about her experience in the area where she’s living now. Her and her Pinay friends were so divided just because of gossip and jealousy. My friend, she’s successful talking about financially and her family life. She just had better life than some of the Pinays there in her area. Well, some of her jealous friend spread rumors that’s not even true about her, she just didn’t do anything because she told me that she had better things to do than to think about those jealous girls. That’s the better approach to that I think, just leave it and later the issue will just die down. That’s what I would do too if I were in her shoes. Most of the gossip girls just don’t have something to do in life other than watch other people’s lives. They might be imitating the soap opera or the teleserye on TFC.

I saw a lot of it here too. It’s just not the Filipinos do that kind of thing, I saw and heard expats too. It’s just human nature to get jealous of the success of others. Some know how to control their jealousy, some just plain anger and jealousy that they can’t sleep without destroying other people. It’s just so crazy to think, but it happens. Some were even killing just over jealousy and gossip. It’s just not worth it. The “Crab mentality” is really present not just in the Philippines but all over the world.

Just like my friend was telling me, she was just letting someone borrow something from her. Then she forgot that the other friend had it for a long time. When time for her to use it, she remembered that the friend had it. She then asked the stuff that was borrowed to be returned. The friend was furious because the friend claimed she own the stuff since she had it for a long time. WOW, the friend had the guts to be mad and to think she’s the one that borrowed something. I can’t believed it that my friend was punished for being nice and trying to help out.

At the end she was blamed that its her fault that the friendship was falling apart. No friendship would fall apart if the friend just return the stuff and just say thank you and sorry that it was not return right away and friendship would flourish. Instead the friend just spread rumors and gossip and she even involved other friends. Even her kids she involved them too, which is really ridiculous and crazy for me.

Living with jealousy and anger will not get her life better. My friend is wishing for a happy and peace of mind for her friend. That she should live life to the fullest instead of bitterness.

Mabuhay!